PARENT ‘HOOD LINK UP: Moms Who Change the Rules

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They look so happy, don’t they? (Not!) This picture was taken at the end of our summer vaca together, with both families this past June. They didn’t want to leave each other. They didn’t want their time to end. We didn’t either. (Baker Boy put on a total “fake” smile for this shot.)

It’s hard when a chapter comes to a close. Not that it takes away from the wonderful times and memories created, it’s just that sometimes, it’s hard.

It was like that when we decided to change the rules a few years ago. We had been stay at home moms for 15 years. We made homemade kool aid playdough, created theme birthday parties, baked bread from scratch, spent hours at the playground with nursing babies and toddlers in tow. We invested. We loved our jobs! We still do.

Our crew 10 years ago.

We just changed the rules.

Our oldest two boys are adults now. With everyone getting older and college for 9 kids looming, we began to feel a little restless. Not only did we want to find a creative outlet, but we wanted to contribute to college tuitions for all of our kids. Our husbands have gladly been the sole bread winners. Honestly, we have those kind of men that are supportive in anything we decide to do. They even stood behind us and cheered us on, when we both joined an “at home party” business. Ok, that only lasted a couple of months…but, it did give us a taste of stepping “outside” the home.

When we started LoveFeast Life, all of a sudden, we had deadlines. We had conference calls to take, weekend trips to make and countless hours of learning. Our kids would run in and expect immediate answers and responses, to which, for the first time in years, we had to respond, “It’ll have to wait, mommy’s working.”

We changed the rules.

At first the kids kinda joked back at us. “Yeah, you have (air quotes) ‘work for the blog’.” But, then they’d pester us until we gave them what they wanted. We wanted to be firm, but weren’t really sure we believed we were really “working” either. It kinda felt like we were just playing at it. But, then things began to progress. Hours increased. Our LoveFeast Shop began to get busier. Our kid’s blog jokes, turned to eye rolling. We could tell they were starting to get miffed at the change, that was staying. (Not to mention, most of them are in their teens. Eye rolling comes with the territory.)

Around this time, I think we both talked to our husbands and let them know we needed them to have our backs. “This is building into a real career. Like, everyone needs to pitch in. We can’t handle the eye rolling.” The dad’s jumped in and began to adjust to the new rules too.

Now we’re stay at home moms, who have a business.

It’s the new us!

Everyone’s still adjusting. We are too. Some days we have a hard time finding the balance. Some days we “check out” at work to compensate for time we didn’t manage well. But, it’s changing.

We’re all getting a bit more confident that this change is here to stay. When the kids talk to their friends they tell them their moms own a business. Secretly, we think they’re pretty proud of us. And truthfully, we couldn’t have done it without them changing right along with us!

Thank you kids!! We love you!

Our families summer 2012


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